Dana DeStefano, a Holt-Sunny Ridge adoptee, shares about her adoption experience and the fulfilling relationship she has with her birth mom, Andrea.
My relationship with my birth mom is unique — I suppose it’s sort of unique to have a relationship with my birth mom at all. I hear many stories about adopted kids meeting their birth families and having disappointing experiences. I also hear stories of adopted kids who don’t have the opportunity to meet their birth parents at all. The relationship between my birth mom, Andrea, and me is such a special part of my life and I feel so blessed. She is my friend. She’s supportive and loving and a great role model. I can talk to her about anything and she will never judge me. She’s fun and cool and I love hanging out with her.
Lately, on our blog and social media, we’ve focused on someone whose voice is often unheard in the adoption story: the birth father. While the birth father is in many cases out of the picture, we recognize that if he is involved, he has a very important role to fill in his child’s life. Because of this, we want to educate our community about the role of birth fathers, and give them a chance to tell their stories. So last week, we shared video interviews with Tim, a birth father who placed his child through Holt-Sunny Ridge. He shared honestly from his own personal experience about finding out about the pregnancy, making the decision with the birth mom to place their child and choosing an adoptive family.
Tim isn’t the only birth father who is speaking out about his experience. Turns out, birth fathers are speaking up! We just need to listen a little more closely.
From the perspective of a birth dad, Tim shares his story about making an adoption plan, getting to know his son’s adoptive family and the importance of remaining in his son’s life.
It’s been a little over four years now. My son’s birth mother and I were not in a serious relationship. In fact, I didn’t even know that I was going to be a father until she was about seven months into her pregnancy — I hadn’t heard from her since we had broken up. I was shocked and scared and didn’t quite believe the news when I first heard it. But then I knew I needed to do the right thing and we needed to figure out what to do, either together or separately.
Choosing adoption is a brave and selfless option for a woman who experiences an unplanned pregnancy. Watch Christy’s story about having an unplanned pregnancy while in high school and choosing adoption for her child.
“It’s not that I would have been a bad parent. I think that in any adoption there’s a lot of conflicting emotions, but I just knew it was the right thing…Even in the worst of times, there’s a sweetness…”
Are you or someone you know experiencing an unplanned pregnancy? You have options, and we want to help you reach the decision that is best for you. Contact us to get started.
In the June 2015 issue of NCFA’s Adoption Advocate, birth mother Amy Hutton Sink writes about her personal experience as a birth mom, how she has learned to set and manage her expectations in open adoption, and how her open adoption arrangement with her child’s adoptive family has shifted and changed over time while still remaining strong.
When a woman discovers she is pregnant and is not ready to parent, she may think about placing her baby for adoption.
Placing a baby for adoption is not an easy thing to do. In fact, one of the first things a woman should do is seek out professional counseling to look at her options. Adoption professionals call this “options counseling” and this can help with the beginning stages of decision making. During options counseling a woman and her counselor explore the options of parenting the child or placing the child with an adoptive family.
When seeking out counseling, a woman should be sure of the following: