Lately, on our blog and social media, we’ve focused on someone whose voice is often unheard in the adoption story: the birth father. While the birth father is in many cases out of the picture, we recognize that if he is involved, he has a very important role to fill in his child’s life. Because of this, we want to educate our community about the role of birth fathers, and give them a chance to tell their stories. So last week, we shared video interviews with Tim, a birth father who placed his child through Holt-Sunny Ridge. He shared honestly from his own personal experience about finding out about the pregnancy, making the decision with the birth mom to place their child and choosing an adoptive family.
Tim isn’t the only birth father who is speaking out about his experience. Turns out, birth fathers are speaking up! We just need to listen a little more closely.
From the perspective of a birth dad, Tim shares his story about making an adoption plan, getting to know his son’s adoptive family and the importance of remaining in his son’s life.
It’s been a little over four years now. My son’s birth mother and I were not in a serious relationship. In fact, I didn’t even know that I was going to be a father until she was about seven months into her pregnancy — I hadn’t heard from her since we had broken up. I was shocked and scared and didn’t quite believe the news when I first heard it. But then I knew I needed to do the right thing and we needed to figure out what to do, either together or separately.
The holidays are expected to be the most joyous time of the year. But for some families, it is the time of year that most intensifies both sadness and stress. Families who have been waiting for a child often feel additional grief and loss during the holidays. These feelings of emptiness can be overwhelming. The emphasis on children is highlighted during this season, often leaving childless families feeling isolated. I remember well the pain after attending countless events with my family and friends at which we were the only couple without children. I could barely escape without either crying or screaming, “Why me?” and “Where is my baby?!” My husband had to drag me to holiday parties and events. I would put a plastic smile on my face and say “I’m so happy to be here,” when in reality I wanted to hide in my bed and wait for the holidays to be over!
During this month, we come together as birth parents, adoptees, families, friends, neighbors, communities and organizations/businesses to celebrate, educate and promote awareness of adoption. For many, adoption is our family’s building blocks, our passion for our work, and for some, the essence of who we are. While for many, adoption is still a hope…
This year for National Adoption Awareness Month, the Children’s Bureau’s theme is “We Never Outgrow the Need For Family.”
So how are you celebrating?
Adoption.com has some really great ideas for how to celebrate, educate and promote awareness of adoption. Here are a few from their “30 days of ideas” to help get you started:
• Listen to Someone’s Story — Hearing someone else’s adoption story can be just as rewarding as sharing your own.
• Ask a Local Library to Display Adoption-Related Books
Choosing adoption is a brave and selfless option for a woman who experiences an unplanned pregnancy. Watch Christy’s story about having an unplanned pregnancy while in high school and choosing adoption for her child.
“It’s not that I would have been a bad parent. I think that in any adoption there’s a lot of conflicting emotions, but I just knew it was the right thing…Even in the worst of times, there’s a sweetness…”
Are you or someone you know experiencing an unplanned pregnancy? You have options, and we want to help you reach the decision that is best for you. Contact us to get started.
The McMillan family. Joe is wearing a bow tie on the far right and Joy is in the green dress.
Last week we were so excited to see a very special story in the Chicago newspaper the Daily Herald!
In an article about a group of high school students who helped assemble prosthetic hands to be donated to people in need, it warmed our hearts to see that this great story included one of our very own Holt-Sunny Ridge families! High-schooler Joseph McMillan got to help assemble a prosthetic hand that was given to his sister, Joy.
We got to know the McMillan family several years ago when they adopted Joy through Holt-Sunny Ridge.
What an amazing experience this must have been for Joseph. In the article, he is quoted as saying that it will be a “whole new world” for his sister. Indeed it will be!
Our warmest wishes to Joy and the McMillan family — we are so happy for you!
Have you ever considered adding to your family through adoption?
Through adoption, you can welcome a child into your heart, home and family. It’s the chance to fulfill your dreams of parenthood and the chance to change the life of a child in need. And here in Illinois and around the world, many children are waiting for loving, stable homes.